One of the most difficult things about having a child with dyslexia is that they are likely to lie. They will lie about everything from how long it took them to get home from school, to whether or not they did their homework! Yesterday, I talked about some reasons these children tell lies.
This blog post will address three ways in which you can stop your children with dyslexia from telling so many lies and hopefully help them on their journey through life.
First of all, it is important to remember that this child, in spite of her struggles, is just as intelligent as your other children. In spite of that, the difficulties she is experiencing can make her feel inferior or even stupid at times, which in turn makes her lie about anything she wants to hide from others for fear of being made fun of or judged negatively.
Knowing the reason why your child lies will better equip you to help her.
This child is exaggerating to cover up her shortcomings and escape pain and humiliation.
Also, it’s easier for her to live in a world she imagines… in a fantasy world.
What Can You Do?
By now, you probably realize how important it is to address this issue before it becomes ingrained into your dyslexic children’s life, but what exactly should you do?
- First, explain the elements of dyslexia in child-friendly terms.
- Emphasize the inconsistency of the challenges your child will face.
- Help her understand what this condition entails.
- Find ways to help her strengthen and showcase her gifts.
- Provide support, include social and emotional areas.
- Provide examples of people who succeeded and are well-known, despite failing in school.
- Emphasize the inconsistency of the challenges your child will face.
- Help your child re-invent herself.
- When she tells you her tall tales, say something like, “I know you wish your life was like that. Now tell me what really happened.”
- Use her gift of imagination to create short stories and/or plays.
- Let her dictate and you act as her scribe.
- Do not kill her imaginative skills. Who knows, you may launch her into a creative writing career.
- Discuss the difference between truth and lies. As you do that, keep in mind the age of your child.
- The American Academy of Pediatrics tells us that children up to the age of 4 years, do not fully understand the difference between truth and fiction.
- Explain lying by asking questions like, “If I said the grass is blue, would that be true? Then clarify that it is a lie.
- Talk about the long-term consequences of lying.
- If she continues to lie, you won’t believe anything she tells you because you won’t know when she’s telling the truth and when she’s lying.
- Similarly, other people won’t like or trust her anymore.
Don’t take the lying personally.
Do your best to show your dyslexic child that being honest is most important and it will help her realize how much easier her life can be if she just tells the truth.
By following these steps, you will find that your dyslexic children will become more honest and the whole family will benefit from this change.
What strategy have you tried to stop a child from lying?
Thank you for sharing these strategies. Our children have to cope with so much, any tools that we can use to be their advocates and help them succeed are very needed.
You’re welcome, Angel. I don’t remember having to cope with half of what the children today have to withstand. My heart goes out to them, so anything I can do to help a parent, I’m willing to do.
I love the section about not taking the lying personally. This is so important.
Yes, Julie, we are often too quick to look at every wrong thing our children do as a personal affront to us.
Florence, what super advice. I have a young relative who lies about…almost anything. The most frustrating is when she says she wants to come for dinner at 6, and she never shows/calls/answers your call. I now wonder if she is dyslexic. Maybe just grossly insecure? At least I know not to take it personally! Good reminder! Thanks for another great piece.
Our children deal with so much that often their challenges are lost in the “shuffle.” I hope your young relative gets help, sooner rather than later.